Lesson 6 119 Copyright 2018 Marline E. Pearson *Commentary on situation three:  It could be you’ve gotten to know each other better, the love chemicals have settled, and you’ve discovered you two are not a good match. Moving on may be wise.  On the other hand, know that in even the best marriages people can find someone else attractive at times. It is natural and normal.  Acting on a periodic attraction is entirely something else. If you love someone and are committed, don’t put yourself in compromising situations that might take you down the path of cheating (e.g. seeing them alone, pouring out your heart or listening to them pour their heart out to you).  Going to deeper levels of emotional intimacy when you feel some chemistry will definitely put you on the path to cheating. And, when children are involved, it’s not just betraying your partner, but cheating on your child.  Most affairs do not start with the first kiss. They start with emotional intimacy—sharing what’s in your heart with someone with whom you feel some chemistry. Work on greater intimacy with your partner. If you are having difficulties, pour your heart out to a wise person who does not have sexual chemistry with you. Point out that one of the most common reasons for people breaking up is that one or both persons’ feelings change: (PP)  After the love chemicals settle down a bit, it becomes clear what you see in each other. You may decide you really don’t fit as a couple. You may have vastly different priorities or interests. It’s not either one’s fault. Your personalities just don’t work together.  Or, after the chemistry settles a bit, you may discover problem behaviors. You may detect issues or problems that make it difficult to have a relationship. One or both of you may need to devote some time to your own development and addressing your issues. Discussion: Common Reasons for Breakups