82 • LESSON 5
Copyright 2023 Marline E. Pearson
The promiscuity (my own and the girls I went for), I’m guessing, was a way to get attention. I picked up
on this, not wanting to wait more than one date for the sex, and went for whichever girl seemed to be the
fastest way to the bedroom. The sex—a contributing factor was our young, high school age—was almost
always disappointing and extremely sketchy. Since I had no good experience to compare it to, I guess I
was just there for the “points”. Happy, normal girls never really caught my eye. I assumed that they were
boring, would not wear exciting underwear, and would want me to wait for sex. The memory of my old
behavior makes me cringe nowadays… I’m doing things differently now—taking my time, working on
being me, and looking for friends who are on a positive path.
Ask the group for their reactions. Add:
❖ This young guy has really given himself some time to reflect on his past. He’s taken a break from
relationships to focus on his own development as a person.
❖ It’s made him a lot clearer in his head about what he really wants and what is really important to him.
(PP) Directions for activity: Select one or more Unmet Needs scenarios
(Resource 5b) depending on your time constraints.
1. Read the situation aloud and ask the group to try to identify the
need(s) behind the behavior described. Is it an unmet physical,
emotional, social, or mental need? It may be more than one.
2. Next, read the questions on the scenario card and have the group brainstorm how this teen might
meet their unmet needs in safe and healthy ways.
Conclude the activity with these words:
❖ It is important to think deeply about your motivations for doing things. Think through what you really
want and what behaviors will more likely help you achieve it.
❖ Be deliberate about your choices and think through the risks to your heart and to your health.
❖ Remember, as humans, we all have these needs. Thinking about how to meet them in safe and healthy ways
is a powerful way to grow and develop yourself. Healthy relationships start with you.
Special note: Announce to the group that if this discussion has raised issues anyone would like to talk
about, you are available. Be sure to have appropriate referral resources.
ACTIVITY
Unmet Needs Scenarios
Copyright 2023 Marline E. Pearson
The promiscuity (my own and the girls I went for), I’m guessing, was a way to get attention. I picked up
on this, not wanting to wait more than one date for the sex, and went for whichever girl seemed to be the
fastest way to the bedroom. The sex—a contributing factor was our young, high school age—was almost
always disappointing and extremely sketchy. Since I had no good experience to compare it to, I guess I
was just there for the “points”. Happy, normal girls never really caught my eye. I assumed that they were
boring, would not wear exciting underwear, and would want me to wait for sex. The memory of my old
behavior makes me cringe nowadays… I’m doing things differently now—taking my time, working on
being me, and looking for friends who are on a positive path.
Ask the group for their reactions. Add:
❖ This young guy has really given himself some time to reflect on his past. He’s taken a break from
relationships to focus on his own development as a person.
❖ It’s made him a lot clearer in his head about what he really wants and what is really important to him.
(PP) Directions for activity: Select one or more Unmet Needs scenarios
(Resource 5b) depending on your time constraints.
1. Read the situation aloud and ask the group to try to identify the
need(s) behind the behavior described. Is it an unmet physical,
emotional, social, or mental need? It may be more than one.
2. Next, read the questions on the scenario card and have the group brainstorm how this teen might
meet their unmet needs in safe and healthy ways.
Conclude the activity with these words:
❖ It is important to think deeply about your motivations for doing things. Think through what you really
want and what behaviors will more likely help you achieve it.
❖ Be deliberate about your choices and think through the risks to your heart and to your health.
❖ Remember, as humans, we all have these needs. Thinking about how to meet them in safe and healthy ways
is a powerful way to grow and develop yourself. Healthy relationships start with you.
Special note: Announce to the group that if this discussion has raised issues anyone would like to talk
about, you are available. Be sure to have appropriate referral resources.
ACTIVITY
Unmet Needs Scenarios
