Lesson 6: RESOURCE 6G 124 Copyright 2018 Marline E. Pearson The Basics: • Don’t drag it out. End it for good. Don’t do the on again, off again thing. • Don’t keep calling your ex just to make sure he/she is okay. • Take precautions if you need to. Change locks? Get help leaving safely? • Tell friends and family. Ask them for support. • Find something nice (and positive) to do for yourself if you are feeling down. Realize the breakup can be hard on your child. • Most children want a relationship with both parents. • Allow your child to talk about feelings of sadness and loss—even if you hate your ex. • Your child will need to process it many times as they enter different stages of life. • Make it possible for your ex to stay in touch with your child. Don’t interfere with his/ her relationship with their child. • Regular contact is important for your child as long as his/her presence isn’t dangerous. • Do not badmouth your ex in front of your child—even if you think he/she deserves it. It just hurts your child and makes them feel bad. • Don’t think just any new partner can substitute for the other parent. Don’t hop quickly into a new relationship. • Focus on being the best parent you can be. • Complete school seek employment. • Learn communication skills to help all your relationships, especially with your ex in co- parenting. • Take a break from relationships—give yourself time. Work on building yourself up. • Next time, don’t slide. Take your time and use the relationship smarts you gain in this program. • Know it takes time (often a long time) for a relationship to develop between a child and a stepparent. • Extended family and mentors can help children if you are parenting solo. Tips for Parents