Copyright 2023 Marline E. Pearson
What exactly goes into making a great relationship or friendship? The answers
to these 7 questions will help you know what to pay attention to in your first,
current, or next relationship. They may help you understand a past one.
1. Are we a good match?
List your interests or things you like to do for fun. Describe yourself in terms of energy and drive—high,
low, or medium. In thinking about a partner or a best friend, how much do you have in common? Do your
personalities fit? Do your differences complement each other?
2. Are our values in sync?
What are your core values your ethical or religious beliefs? Does your partner or friend share them? Are you on
the same page about responsibility, how you treat others, commitment, parenting? Are you both on the same
page about sex and alcohol and drugs, and is it a healthy page to be on?
3. Am I attracted to a person I admire or to a fantasy of what I want?
Do you genuinely like your partner’s (or friend’s) personality? If yes, identify the things you admire, enjoy, and
respect about this person. Is this person a good role model for children? If not, identify the characteristics that
you would not want a child to see.
4. Am I changing myself just to get someone’s love or friendship?
Can you be yourself, or do you find yourself trying to be the way this person wants you to be? What qualities of
yours do you want a partner or friend to notice, admire, and respect about you?
Seven Questions to Ask
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